I have always been a champion for feeling feelings since I was a kid. I knew it was important, but I had always been alone with that mindset. “Cowboy logic” dictates that if it hurts, hide it. Let it roll off your back. That’s how I was raised. Grin and bear it, suck it up, get over it, move on, pull yourself up from your bootstraps, be a big girl, you’re young; you don’t know what real pain is, keep a stiff upper lip….. If you don’t stop cryin’, I’ll really give you something to cry about!
Good girls and boys do not cry or get angry.
The Christmas song “you better watch out; you better not cry, you better not pout I’m tellin’ you why”. And…. —The “Raindrops keep falling on my head” song.
“Raindrops keep falling on my head
But that doesn’t mean my eyes will soon be turning red
Crying’s not for me ’cause, I’m never gonna stop the rain By complaining,
Because I’m free Nothing’s worrying me”
And then there’s the “Don’t worry be happy song”. …. And these are just three tiny examples, but that is what our whole cult-ure teaches us straight out of the womb.
Feelings are wrong — is the message. Vulnerability is weakness. Being human is bad. Go against nature. Resist. Repress. Suppress. So the lot of us live in a perpetual state of resistance, blame, unconscious victimhood and then we wonder why we don’t know ourselves or why we and the world suffer so greatly.
I had always been a feeling person, but since feelings in our culture are socially unacceptable, I had to turn them off early in life with alcohol, cigarettes, binge-eating, and through dissociative methods such as living in my head. As a result, I remember being angry all the time. That is what the suppression of feelings can do! We have a lot of passive-aggressive adults because we drank the kool-aid as children and learned our natural built-in healing mechanisms (emotions) were bad.
Now, as an adult, I see our culture is starting (slowly but surely) to validate what I had always believed to be true about emotions. People are evolving and learning that expressing and releasing emotions are Necessary for those who wish to not survive but THRIVE. I had always known giving full expression to emotions was the key to freedom, sovereignty, joy, love, compassion, connection to others and disidentification with the Ego. I also know that is key to knowing the self on every level and that if we know who we are, we can know and empathize and love others due to our inherent connectivity. I think most problems in the world can be deduced to the shutting off of emotion.
I just recently read this passage in my book:
“In order to fully embrace our inner power, we first need to accept all emotions rather than ignoring certain emotions that we think are too weak, bad, or negative. Suppressing emotions doesn’t end them; it just buries the emotions under the surface. So the suppressed emotions are waiting for their chance to come back. This is why some people feel the same fear, anger, and sorrow repeatedly — and sometimes quite unexpectedly.
In other words, when you judge and suppress emotions, you become your own threatening enemy from whom you can never get away. You also miss feeling joy and happiness because all emotions come through the same pathway. Suppressing one emotion means suppressing all emotions. Consequently, your life shrinks as your feelings shrink. In contrast, if you dare to feel all emotions, you will soon find that the emotions pass quite quickly. ~”Why We Are Born: Remembering Our Purpose through the Akashic Records” by Akemi G
I highly recommend the book above. Outside of Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World, this is the best book I ever read.
Also, this should be obvious, but when we talk about expressing emotion, this doesn’t mean acting the emotion out. This means expressing it in a safe place in such a way that we are not victimizing someone else. We can most certainly confront others without making new victims. We can even confront others when they aren’t even around or even deceased. How we feel our feelings is individual.
Finally, I want to say that not everyone is meant to feel feelings. Astrologically or through our own soul contracts, we might have placements or plans to keep feelings blocked. That might be because for some of us, the release of emotions might get in the way of another purpose we came here for. Some might need to have experiences suppressing emotions for a very long time before they realize the importance of emotional release as well. It is not wise to judge those who either don’t feel or who do feel. We cannot know any other path than our own.