I am not a fan of the word “intense”. It is often used to suggest a “pathology” when it just might instead point to one who isn’t afraid of being in their realness. For the same reason, I don’t like the word “dramatic”. In a stoic world where so many are terrified of emotion — especially anger, of course, authentic people will make others feel discomfort. But what if there is no such thing as “intensity” or such things as “being dramatic”? What if there are only people who are afraid of emotionally honest people?
What if the words “intense” or “dramatic” are just another way we gaslight other people’s real experiences?
When some are going through a rough time and they show anger, suspicion or bitterness, while it might appear to be “over the top”, what if what they are experiencing is very real for them? When we jump so fast to call someone “intense” or “dramatic” we are denying the heavy emotion stirring underneath the surfaced anger. Anger sometimes protects us from getting hurt even more. And anger is a stigmatized taboo emotion.
Language is something to think about.