Positivity, the New Word for Fear

False-positivity is a fear-based defense mechanism we might use to protect ourselves from truths we might not  want to face. Often this form of denial is masqueraded as an enlightened state when in reality, people in this state cannot cope with reality. There is nothing wrong with living in fear, but so long as we... Continue Reading →

Core Engergetics VS Primal Theory

There are some therapies out there that promise the body stuff and the emotional release and we can get a tremendous amount of benefit from those cathartic therapies. But there is a caveat. In the case of Core Energetics (CE), they might interrupt the automatic process of regression and reliving. Contrary to popular belief, to... Continue Reading →

Replacing Mothership with Friendship

What if kindness, compassion, selflessness and love come authentically only after a process through trauma recovery? What if some forms of nice-ness are trauma responses often called "the fawn response" while kindness is a byproduct of healing? Are we being unrealistic when we ask others to be nice to us? Be nice. Be kind. Be... Continue Reading →

Classical Music is Boring?

Many think classical music is boring and I cannot blame people for that. To be fair, we are not really exposed to all the branches of the tree of classical music. Our exposure is grossly limited. My husband has opened my eyes to cathartic classical music. How can one watch the below orchestra and think... Continue Reading →

Highly Relational Beings

I am so glad there is a "word" for people like myself. My real people are those who aren't afraid of communication. "As many of us have found out, silence can be violence when it is used in an effort to wound. It is one of the most potent ways to cause deep suffering. And... Continue Reading →

To Meditate or Not?

I came across an article written by an advocate of Dr. Arthur Janov on meditation that I found to be fair and brilliantly written. For psychology nerds and/or those on the healing path, I highly recommend this piece. You might be surprised with his take on meditation and feeling feelings.

No Such Thing as an Overreaction

Not if we truly understand trauma.... I admire Marilyn Van Derbur for talking about this in her book. Last summer was the worst I felt in years due to a trigger that put me into a tailspin. Someone I knew brought on an adoption-trauma emotional flashback and I haven't been the same since. There is... Continue Reading →

How to Manipulate People

It is not difficult to brainwash people. Our culture is based on submission to authority and has a high respect for people in high places such as academia.  Many of us drop our discernment at scientism, degrees, status, or when an older dignified-looking man is talking with impressive language. If there is something you want... Continue Reading →

Can the Effects of Trauma Be Passed Down?

We definitely have genetic predispositions to physical illness, our appearance or a predisposition to how we might respond to stress in our environment. That is passed down through the genes. But these predispositions are activated with stimuli in the environment. For those who understand Epigenetics, the genes are the gun and our environment are the... Continue Reading →

Crying Won’t Make Anyone Perfect…

Cathartic Healing: Realistic VS Unrealistic Expectations |What happens when you start to rise from the ashes... Some might find I am on the healing path and expect me to be devoid of sin and expect me to be nice and sterile and squeaky clean since I am doing the cathartic self-work. Just the opposite is... Continue Reading →

What Intensity Might Really Imply?

I think intensity really means emotion and trauma. Very few people can handle deep emotions and traumatic material from others and this can cause great anxiety that we call "intense". We blame others, but it's really our own stuff, our own deeply repressed material, our anxiety. Because that is what "intense" really means when we... Continue Reading →

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