Are those really boundaries we have or our attempts at trying to change people’s personalities or a need to control others so we don’t have to face hard truths about ourselves?
I see people who have firm healthy boundaries. They are able to say “no” and they are able to ask for what they need. They are empowered people and it shows. And then I see others using boundaries to stifle the voice in others, to censor, and to micromanage. These people are disempowered.
Healthy boundaries are about taking full responsibility for our own lives and well-being whereas unhealthy boundaries are an obsession used as an excuse to control the lives and well-beings of others. That’s how to know the difference.
Boundaries are great, but when we start using them to dominate others, they aren’t really “boundaries” anymore — they are just more ways in which we want a socially acceptable excuse to manipulate people.