Most things about me are slow and “late to the party” for a lack of a better term. My mom used to call me a “dumb Pollack” growing up because it takes me a long time to learn new things. I am also slow to understand what people are saying and often ask people to repeat what they are saying. I ask a lot of questions too which gives the impression of stupidity in our culture. I was held back in the 4th grade as my teacher thought I was slow. I am slow to understand jokes too. I am a late bloomer in every aspect of my life. My adoptive family were mostly New Yorkers who are very fast-paced and impatient, so I always felt (and still do) feel a ridiculous amount of pressure to be as fast-paced and quick-witted like the rest of the world. This is part of the reason I am not more social. I am scared to death of getting a job because I am always the last to understand how to do things and am not considered “productive”. I cannot multi-task. My boss and co-workers think I am an imbecile. And I feel stupid and finding myself wishing I could be more like everyone else. For those reading this that know me, you know I am slow to change and learn.
I am happy to report my best friend/husband is just as slow as I am and feels the same pressure I do, so we are a match made in Heaven. 😂
But it’s not all bad. I compensate for my slowness because by taking my time to learn things, I wind up understanding complicated issues very deeply and thoroughly. My husband has that same depth as well. When he finally understands something, it’s deep. And having my husband who loves me just the way I am really helps me realize I am not the horrible person I thought I was born as.
For those of you who have very fast brains or who can multitask like a badass, please try to be more patient with those who are slowpokes. I can promise you that we KNOW we are slow and we are not trying to ruin your day. Please don’t take our slowness personally. A little patience and tolerance can really make a difference.
Thank you all for listening!