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Highly Relational Beings
I am so glad there is a "word" for people like myself. My real people are those who aren't afraid of communication. "As many of us have found out, silence can be violence when it is used in an effort to wound. It is one of the most potent ways to cause deep suffering. And... Continue Reading →
How Barry Manilow’s Music Kept Me Going and Gave Me Hope
Everyone's journey is different, but I need my healing process to have some big gaps of just plain old fun. I need my comforts and my enjoyments. Some may call them escape mechanisms, but whatever they are, I need to have some enjoyment in my life. I need to get out of the house, need... Continue Reading →
Have you been accused of taking things personally?
Just like anyone else, I sometimes take it personally when someone takes something personally. But is it something to shame others for? Should we shame ourselves over it? I see even those who are against shaming and belittling others doing it too. Even those who embrace emotions as necessary to healing, also shame those who... Continue Reading →
The Difference Between Being Desensitized and Healed
Are you shut down or healed? There is a notable difference. I used to be desensitised up until the time I was 31; I was like a stone. I didn't feel much of anything. When I went to events where people would cry like retreats, graduations or funerals, I was usually was one of the... Continue Reading →
How to Move Out of Victimhood and Blame
When I was in therapy, one of the best pieces of advice I ever got was when my therapist told me "You are responsible for your actions, but you are never responsible for someone else's feelings." Of course in this context, she was talking about the feelings of adults and how we should be responsible... Continue Reading →
Why Hardship is Sometimes Necessary
Tragedy, pain, loss, and hardship are unpleasant, but I think it's necessary. I don't want bad things to happen to me or others, but I appreciate the reason hardship exists. I think we need uncomfortable events to happen in the world so that we may learn who we are and also learn how to love... Continue Reading →
The Desire to Please to Avoid Rejection Memories
I have two conflicting sides of myself. The one that writes freely from my own neurosis and prejudices and the one that critiques my writing and sees through the lens of the collective that sees potential social faux pas.. You CANNOT possibly criticize me more than I can to myself. I dare you to try.... Continue Reading →
Cognitive Dissonance and How to Handle Controversial Information Online
I provide a couple reasons as to why we become emotionally unstable when we hear information that competes with the information we were brought up to believe about the world. Nothing should ever be controversial to talk about. Everything should be up for grabs. Any topic. So, why can't we have an emotionally-detached conversation without... Continue Reading →
The Right-fighters Way to Win Arguments Online
How to win an argument online: ---Misrepresent your opponent's argument when you don't have an argument. ---Misrepresent your opponent when you don't have an argument. --Repeat the mainstream narrative over and over again when you don't have an argument. ---Answer a question with a question when you don't have an argument. ---Insult, shame and mock... Continue Reading →
Why I Am Here
I used to hide my writings. Even on Facebook, I would only show my writings to a select few as I knew others wouldn't appreciate my thoughts and feelings as a lot of my views contradict mainstream social attitudes. And that's OK. My husband who is a fan of my work told me I was... Continue Reading →
