Replacing Mothership with Friendship

What if kindness, compassion, selflessness and love come authentically only after a process through trauma recovery? What if some forms of nice-ness are trauma responses often called "the fawn response" while kindness is a byproduct of healing? Are we being unrealistic when we ask others to be nice to us? Be nice. Be kind. Be... Continue Reading →

Highly Relational Beings

I am so glad there is a "word" for people like myself. My real people are those who aren't afraid of communication. "As many of us have found out, silence can be violence when it is used in an effort to wound. It is one of the most potent ways to cause deep suffering. And... Continue Reading →

Adoption Trauma

Paul Sunderland Talks About Adoption and Addiction... If I could ask anything of the world, it would be to better understand trauma. Today, more specifically adoption trauma. Why are some of us so hyper-vigilant in relationships? Why do some adult adoptees push others away before their friends get a chance to? Why are some of... Continue Reading →

The Social Taboo of Need

In our social darwinistic dog-eat-dog-each-human-to-themself culture, needing help from family,  friends, and surprisingly even (sometimes) professionals is unacceptable and something to be ashamed of, generally speaking. Many of us have been brought up to believe it is sexy to be fiercely independent. A badass is someone who works hard and gets it all done by... Continue Reading →

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