How to Stay in Your Own Lane

...and how to help people when they are down...... People can appear to be "stuck in victimhood". To resolve this, ask yourself why this happens. When you feel you have the answer, but are still silently condemning or are still irritated or feel the need to lecture, then you might not know the real reason... Continue Reading →

No Such Thing as an Overreaction

Not if we truly understand trauma.... I admire Marilyn Van Derbur for talking about this in her book. Last summer was the worst I felt in years due to a trigger that put me into a tailspin. Someone I knew brought on an adoption-trauma emotional flashback and I haven't been the same since. There is... Continue Reading →

What Intensity Might Really Imply?

I think intensity really means emotion and trauma. Very few people can handle deep emotions and traumatic material from others and this can cause great anxiety that we call "intense". We blame others, but it's really our own stuff, our own deeply repressed material, our anxiety. Because that is what "intense" really means when we... Continue Reading →

Why Adult Trauma Might Be So Unbearable

It's not so much adult trauma that shapes us. The traumas that shape our lives and rule us from the shadows come from repressed childhood trauma. The reason adult trauma might have such an impact might be because it's causing the forgotten childhood trauma up to the surface through emotional flashbacks. Anytime we have a... Continue Reading →

Is It Bad to Wish Pain on Our Abusers?

I used to be concerned with being spiritual back in 2014 when I started dipping my feet into popular spirituality, but over the last few years, my main concern is centered on being authentic. That is going to include (expressed in a safe environment) all of my authentic violent blood-red rage, anger, shame, sadness, terror,... Continue Reading →

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